If You Give A Mouse A Cookie, v. 2

If you check on one of your kids before bed, you’re liable to be told that they don’t have any underwear for tomorrow.

If you ask whether they put it in the hamper, because you just did laundry and saw very little of it, you’re liable to be told that they threw it away.

If you ask why in the hell they threw away their underwear, they’re liable to say that it didn’t fit anymore.

If you ask why in the hell didn’t they tell you at a time when you could actually do something about it, they’re liable to say that they forgot.

If you ask them to wear something small for tomorrow until you get replacements, they’re liable to complain that it’ll be uncomfortable and whine about why can’t you go out to the 24 hour Walmart NOW to get it for them?

If you turn out the lights on them and proceed to say goodnight to another child, the other is liable to say that they overheard and by the way, his underwear is tight as well.

If you go the store the next day you realize that the two boys are similar enough in size that Medium is going to closely resemble Large and that if one of them gets the wrong size by mistake, he’s liable to refuse to wear it.

If you return the wrongly stored underwear to the original owner, he’s liable to complain that he won’t wear underwear touched by his brother and will pitch a minor fit.

If you tell him to suck it up since it wasn’t worn, he’s liable to complain and whine about why can’t you go to the 24 hour Walmart NOW to get a new pair?

If this continues, you decide to let them go to bed without any night-time goodnights and checks and they’re liable to complain about how uncaring you are.

If you then go back to checking on the kids before bedtime, you’re liable to be told that they don’t have any underwear for tomorrow.

Oy.

 

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